What is a Life Worth Living?

It’s that time of year where everyone is reflecting on what they hope to accomplish and resolve to making changes from how they previously behaved. What if you were able to feel more fulfilled on a day to day basis by embracing the life you’re already living?

Many of us can go through life counting down the days until the weekend, until the next trip, until the next big event that we are excited for. Often when we do this, by the time the event comes that we were so excited for, we may feel some disappointment or let down. In addition to potentially feeling let down, we are wasting the days in between by only focusing on the big, exciting things in life. Our lives are filled with more ordinary days than extraordinary days, and by wishing away those ordinary days we miss out on a lot of life. Life is always happening around us and it is up to us how we spend that time.

Creating a life worth living is a concept that was brought to light through Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). A life worth living will look different to everyone as it’s based on each individuals own likes and values. We know that there are going to be hard, challenging times in our lives and we cannot get rid of pain and suffering completely; by creating a life worth living, it makes us less likely to engage in behaviors that can be harmful to ourselves and allows us to find contentment, fulfilling, and joyful moments in the ordinary.

How do I create a Life Worth Living?

The concept of a life worth living may feel overwhelming at first, and that is okay. The good new is, you probably are already doing things that make your life worth living. A life worth living is about the small moments that happen day to day; it is not about how successful you are, how much you have accomplished, or what you still are working towards. Remember, it doesn’t matters what others think your life should look like.

To reflect on what makes your life worth living, take some time to yourself. Go to your favorite coffee shop or make yourself comfortable on the couch. Now take some time to reflect on your values. Values are basic and fundamental beliefs that guide or motivate attitudes and actions; they help us determine what is important to us. If you need help coming up with values, check this list out. By identifying your personal values, you are able to return to this list at times where you might be doubting yourself; our values are a part of everything we do. When we don’t act in accordance with our values we often experience feelings of emptiness, disappointment, loss of direction, and “not like ourselves.” When we act in accordance with our values we often feel more fulfilled, energized, and more like ourselves.

Some other questions you can ask yourself to clearly define your values include:

What is important to me?
What type of person do I want to be?
What do I want to spend my energy on?

Next, brainstorm things that bring you joy, happiness, gratitude, or elicit any other positive emotion. There is nothing too big or too small that can go on this list. A life worth living is all about finding pleasure in the small moments of our every day life. It’s okay if your list looks completely different than those around you, it’s supposed to. This list is personal to you, and you alone.

Things that can be included on this list include:

Interacting with certain people (friends, family, your workout instructor)
The first sip of coffee/tea you have in the morning
Watching the sunset/sunrise
Working out
Laughing (by yourself and surrounded by others)
Watching your favorite sports team
The smell of rain
Swinging at the park
Being near/in the water
Eating mac n’ cheese
Driving with the windows down and singing to the radio
Wearing fuzzy slippers
That still moment in the house before everyone gets up to start their day
Using your favorite water bottle
Watching your favorite show/movie
Reading your favorite book/magazine/comic
Listening to your favorite artists/song/podcast
Playing with your pet
Hugging others
Traveling
Cuddling with a favorite stuffed animal/blanket

If you need help coming up with other ideas or looking for more inspiration, check out this list of pleasant activities.

Why bother creating a Life Worth Living?

Resolutions can sometimes feel overwhelming and intimidating. Creating a life worth living allows you to reflect on all the small things that are currently in your life that may be over looked; we are able to celebrate all the small wins we accomplish each and every day. By identifying our values and the small moments of each day that make our life worth living, it strengthens our neural pathways that are leading to joy or contentment. If we identify and focus on what brings us happiness, joy, and contentment, we will then strengthen these neural pathways. When we focus on stressful things, it strengthens the stress pathways in our brain. We can help guide our brain on what we want to focus on and search out in the world by giving it a list of things that make us feel good. As we live and grow, we are able to continue adding and changing our list of what makes a life worth living. Identifying what makes life worth living will not prevent challenges and hardships from arising, however it does help us to find positive moments amidst the chaos.

Interested in learning more?

If you’re intrigued and want support in understanding what a life worth living looks like for you, reach out to see if any of our clinicians are a good fit. We are all here to help you create the life you want to live.